the 1 kg mark ;)

Hola! I'm so bored right now so i just felt like updating meh blog. Hmmm what to post. Well I've been so bored here in Brunei and mostly stuck in the house. I can't wait till I get back in Philippines. It should be more interesting than here. Much much more interesting. I miss my friends back there.. the real ones. Sigh. I guess I shouldn't go in there. Anywaysss I've also been going to the gym these past few days and eating less. I'm trying to lose few pounds. Actually mainly on the tummy. I'm doing a lot of cardio and focusing on the abs. There's been some improvements I guess. I've lost 1 kg. hehe. But no visual progress yet. I hope it'll work. If not then I guess it's ok, I'm happy with my body right now as well. :)

I watched Tron last Saturday in 3D! It was ok. Not exactly impressed with it that much. But I love the Ducati in their, and the eye makeup of Quora and the other girl. I'm such a weirdo, mixed much? heehee. Sunday was a typical family day in the house. Barbecue for lunch, Dad fixing stuff, me and mom cooking, movies together at night. :) Though family ain't complete yet. My brother will come on the 24th and my sister/cousin tommorow. Everyone's here for Christmas! Yay!

Speaking of Christmas, I don't like spending Christmas here in Brunei. Sigh. I know it really shouldn't matter where you are and the spirit of Christmas should be in your heart and should be nowhere affected by decorations around you. But it's so much better in Philippines, back home where everyone celebrates it, the Christmas spirit is so alive and jolly unlike here. At Christmas eve, the house looks so lively, food, lights, songs sand carols, laughter, relatives, gifts, neighbors coming over and you coming over there as well, it's just so amazing. I guess I just have to stop being a grinch and be happy that the whole family will be here and find the spirit of Christmas in my heart. hahaha. ;)

I guess I gotta go now. I got nothing to say nymore and it's pretty late. Prolly be back tommorow when I'm uber bored! I miss my lappy! my gaaaddd! So anyways cioa!!!!

xoxo

ashiza

Movies

Been watching movies since I got back here in Brunei since there's nothing to do anyways. :) I watched, The Chronicles of Narnia: Voyage of the Dawn Treader, Rapunzel or Tangled, and of course Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows pt 1.

Of course Harry Potter was a must watch. I loved it, well maybe I'm biased since I've always been an HP fan. It was really good for me though a wee bit disappointed coz they didn't get some scenes right. Sads. But I guess they really had to compressed and change a bit of this and that. My dad didn't like the movie. He said the story moved slow... Guess he's more of an action guy but he did like Order of the Phoenix, or as he called it the one where the other guy fought with Dumbledore. :)) I love the actors, they played it oh-so-right. Fred and George, still hilarious as ever. Ginny and Hermione were gorgeous, my goodness. Ron was Ron but in a more mature way. Harry... what can I say... i.just.adore.him. He's amazing. :) Both the character and the actor. All the other were great as well. I can't wait for the pt 2.Though I could say this phrase with the books, maybe for it to be complete, I need to finish the movies as well (no question bout that anyways) "I have stuck with Harry till the end"

Tangled. I laughed so hard. So much. :)) This movie was hilarious. I really enjoyed this movie. Rapunzel was one of my favorite fairytale. I once had a game in our pc when I was what, 6? 7? that I played over and over again. I still have the CD right now. haha. It was Barbie Rapunzel. I always fancy myself one since I have long hair since i was a kid ;) Anyways this movies was really nice and enjoyable. The rendition was funny and goofy in a good way since the main concept of the story is still there and its still fairytale-ish.

Last one... Narnia. I guess it's ok. And since I've read the books it was kinda... a disappointment a lil? The usual, some scenes aint there, scenes that wasnt right. But I think they succeeded in giving a good visualization of the movie. :) Gaaaddd! Caspian is hawt! hehe. Nothing much to say here. hehe

I wanted to watch these in 3D but fortune does not smile upon me. It was always full even though we try to book early. Maybe when I'm back in Philippines. But no more good movies. Sads. Anyways I guess this is where I end my post! Ciao~

glaizamariie17

xoxo

Gym!

After days and days of procrastination I, ladies and gentlemen, have started going to the gym. YAY! It was tedious. I was so excited and all. Trainer guy was all good and british-accent-hunk guy that showed me all around. Then, well, do what the gym was paid for. haha. Started with cardio. Elliptical, treadmill, rowers. Whew! Tiring. Very tiring. It felt like my heart is gonna get out of the chest XD Oh I was so stupid to actually forget to bring water >.<>

So it took me around 1 hour and 20 minutes? or something like that. I didnt feel anything at first on the way back. But gaaad! after a while of walking at the house i suddenly felt it. My body is feels all so soorrree. :( Its making me so crabby. Not to mention my headache and i'm damn hungry. Im trying to lessen my food intake so gym won't be in vain. It's so hard.

I never actually went through with this keeping fit whenever i start to but I never did apply for a gym membership before. Back then it was only going tennis, jogging, and swimming. Then mom would stock some junk food in the fridge and say bye bye to the plan. :P I'm not exactly overweight but you could see fats on my arms (CHICKEN WINGS :S) and on the tummy (so so awful).

So maybe this one will stick. Hopefully. I mean gym is gonna be paid for and I wont want that to be such a waste right? Actually I don't mind exercising. Its the food. The fooooddd! I love eating. Gaadd. This is gonna be hard but i'll try. We'll see how far I can persevere. Besides it's only the first day so maybe, just maybe, it'll get better. :)

-glaii17

Its raining ♥

Its raining. I love the rain but its's making me miss him more. It's been 6 days, almost a week since we parted. The verdict? IT SUCKS. I don't know how I'm gonna bear with this for 86 more days. See how insane i'm going coz of this? I actually counted the days till we see each other again.

The rain outside makes me think and sad on just about everything. I've never really believed in long distance relationship. I don't know, cynical as it maybe but the stories you hear, the shows you watch, the people you know who didn't survive a LDR (long distance relationship). The distance between them seemed to overwhelm the whole relationship, the emotions that they have. What makes it so different when your other half is not beside you? The touch? The caress? Their mere voice? As they said, Long distance don't work.

But now, I'm convinced otherwise. There's this hope or voice within that says it's gonna be all okay. Even though it sucks and sometimes insufferable it seems like nothing will happen that can break us off. It feels so reassuring. I felt really reassured. Is it this way when you really like? love? the person? When the other person you already consider as your other half or already a part of you? Each day is awful. You just can't wait till you finish the ldr phase.

I miss him like crazy. I just can't wait till I finish counting the days. Those 86 days to 0. Ashwin Radha Nathan. Can't wait! ♥♥♥

-ashiza16

Holidays again!

Holidays again. And I'm kinda hating it. I'm missing my Ashwin. :(

So holidays. The past semester in curtin was wonderful? Though there were some awful parts? Those chapter led to one of the most important things of my life. :) Ashwin. It has been awesome being with him. In a short span of time that we've been together... it's just been so much. I can't really describe it. But I know that my 3 months holiday without him is just gonna be awful, It's gonna be 3 months of missing him. Sigh. It's gonna be a challenge.

Another major thing that happened is that I lost some people. Its bad. All is well now. But it's kinda hard just getting to that point where everything is exactly the same. Maybe too much strain has been put in between. Too much to get over with just like that. Perhaps the realization that there's just too much difference now. But nothing to lose by trying.

I'll be up posting updates on my blog. On my Tumblr account! And of course my Twitter account! Don't forget to follow me! :)

Ciao! Gonna be spending lots of time here. Well basically in the computer with all the internet stuff. hehe!

Lovelots!

Just a Dream (Cover) ♥ ♥ ♥

This is just so awesome. I'm in loovvee with this guy! He's amazing! :) Oh im talking bout the guy in black. Proud to be Pinoy maaan! Gaaad! The song is awesome as well. My gaaassshhh. I could listen to him all day. Wish he'd come touring here in Brunei or maybe in Philippines or Malaysia. Damniiitt. JV can you be my bf? pweaaseee. hahaha. Here yah all. Listen!

-gm17 ♥ ♥ ♥

;)

Life goes on

Life goes on. Its true that you can sum up life in just these three words. The world aint gonna stop even if everything seems to be crumbling. It won't wait for you till you had the strength to get the heck out of bed and be ready to be out. No, it will go on, clock will tick and the sand will fall. So you got to bear everything and learn on how to deal with everything.

But its not really so easy at times. It's hard to get up and ignore the pain inside you. Its awful to just pretend that you're not hurting inside. But you have to move on. One more thing is that it's hard to admit that you still care. That you're actually hurting inside. There's no exact solution for this problem. There's no guide book, manual, or instructions. You gotta figure it out for yourself. Experience it. I know it sucks but its the only way i think.

Looking at the bright side and what on ahead won't do any harm though. Enjoying every minute of good things or making everything good is a nice start. Takes a lot of your mental capabilities but it does work at times. :)

So emo. heehee. But hey its just a thought in my lazy monday afternoon. So ciao!

Jump, dive in, headfirst

Got to stop checking out the water and just dipping my toe. Diving in, headfirst. :)

Requested by ???? :P

Hola! Now this one was a request for ???? Here yah go. Prolly not my best work. But i think it works.If i do say so myself. :) Hope yah like it. And give a title for it as well.

Your laughter used to be so silly

Now it just makes me happy

Your late night calss used to disturb my nap

Now waiting for it is what keeps me up

Our little silly conversations

Slowly turns into little sweet sessions

Your touch used to be nothing

Now each sends my heart pounding

Things have changed before i knew it

And next thing I know I was falling bit by bit

Your voice, your smile I find comforting

In a different way, now my soul you're touching

I could not stop, it feels so right

Now you're all i think about at night

It might be wrong and a big risk to take

But with my heart skipping, its one that i'll take...

-gLaizaMarie.

Moving Out

~I wish i could have done this with my house :)

Whew. I went back on the wrong week. I went back last Saturday and I remembered thats the day we were moving out! It was sooo tiring! Carry this carry that. Move this move that. Arrange this and arrange that. My back was hurting on day 1. My hips was hurting on day 2. Basically lots and lots of pain. :( It took 3 days to actually make the new house at least livable. And I gotta take care of the phone and internet stuff because my parent are too busy with other things. Whew. I gave them a piece of my mind. They told me it'll take weeks. Like hell. Made them do it within 3 days >:) I just realized I could actually do the management thingy.

Anyways on another note, some issue brewed up while I was away there. The GIST:

I apparently did something. They pratically publicized it. But I didn't do the thing. I said sorry. I don't know what their reply is. I think they already know that I didn't do it. But still nothing. I lowered my ego. Still nothing. I made a good argument since I'm innocent anyways. Still nothing. I've been shrugging it off mostly. And ash is helping me. But I don't know. basically me clueless.

Friends are friends. I don't know. To me, thats self explanatory. Sigh.

Signing off now. Ciao!

Scared of a Real Chance

I’ve been racking my brains for so long now. When it comes to you I’m always out of answers except yes into everything that you want. I’m hypnotized. I’m stuck. It’s you, when it’s you it’s always different. My very principles on which I found my entire self changes just for you. With you I’m always back at square one… I love you.

God knows I’ve tried the other way around. But I still go back to you. You don’t help either. It’s like lightly you’re still holding my hand back. It hurts so much but I’m used to the pain there. I know we’re never gonna happen again, but I still hope. But at the back on my mind I know it never will. . .

It’s been like this for so long now. I wanna let go. At least I think I want to, or I have to. It’s been too long that I’m yours. Everyone makes fun of me coz I’m a lil stupid and a fool for you. I can’t tell them otherwise like the lil times we have together because you’ll say otherwise, which just makes me a mere fool again.

I can only bear so much… Now there came to a point where I’m actually scared to those who really care for me, who am truly sincere. I’m so used to the uncertainty and pain within me that a sign of a real chance scares me…

Been lotsa happenings for the past two weeks. But so far its been awesome. lemme upload some pics to summarize some of 'em coz I still need to study! hahaha.

Beach Party y'all!

Some after party at thai bar :) ...

:">

Then girls day out the day after...

Met Kate's new housemate then shisha and dinner followed, Ashwin, A not so bad guy. Actually, real nice ;)

Few days after, Cooking session in kate's new house. :)

Whew. Lotsa more pics and happenings. But apart from studying I need to get ready now coz Mona just called and us wanna go KFC. woooh! hahaha. Ciao!

Her.

She's in love. She realizes finally that she never really fell out of love with him. She thought it was her who knew better on what's happening. Oh how naive she was. It took time, but now she thinks that he never really fell out of in love with her either. Who were they fooling? No one it seems. They're both in love. She's off limits and he proved to her that he is as well. No commitment, no words, just the two of them.

:)

Cross the Line

I can be tolerant. I can be nice. I can be patient. I aint saying i'm perfect or super nice. But gaaaaaddd. I hate it when people force me to do anything, I hate to be tied down. I hate being caught off guard. And heck giving me an attitude if I somehow couldn't hide my abhorrence for it at times. I hate being cornered like its an interrogation session.

Even i have issues like that with fam and hell just someone do that to me and you expect a free pass? I try to be patient and considerate to other people. But there's a point where you crossed the line.

Not that honey

I gotta tone down on my niceties. Its giving 'em a whole different idea. Gaaaadd. Confusing, infruriating, FUNNY. Sheesh.

Saying that it wouldnt work and it was too easy? Honey its not called flirting, its called being polite and friendly. Be sure with your conclusions before you end up embarrassing yourself 'kay? And actually hurting people. You clearly don't know me hunz. It's just been a few days since you've met me. And here you are actin' up. Get it right honey ;)

My 26th and Pride

There she walked with a book in hand

Expectation in another, she headed in the sand

A smile appeared when saw a friend

Ocean waves and sweet breeze in trend

With laughter and stories in the middle

Her mood was up, it was no riddle

Another page to fill, she tried to remove

She finds a person and she was on the move

In sight he was but occupied too

She hesitated to disturb and give him a clue

The clock ticks, the book started to thin

Disappointment arise and a frown begin

This wasn't the first, it was the second

He promised not to, thats what she reckon

A friend he was though not it seemed

Words are nothing, though it makes her wanna scream

Though it he doesn't appear to be, he was a friend

Teases me all the way, sometimes with no end

Not so subtle at times, but she knows how to handle it

She tried her best, though its hard a bit

Is it pride that was hurt or something different?

Sensible is it or mere stupidity at present

She was hurt though she tried not to be

A smile she tried and just write it free

Oh my Sunday!

The cough and slight fever should've been a tip when I woke up this morning or the bad dream before that that this day wouldn’t be… interesting? different? bad? I don’t really wanna call it bad because it wasn’t that bad.

I watched Sorcerer’s Apprentice today and I gotta say it was very cool. But I forgot my glasses >.< (another one). The movie was awesome. I liked the way they tried to rationalize everything. All in all, I liked the movie.

Otw home was the real star moment of the day. I was gonna grab my phone then BAM! It wasn’t there. I was practically having a mini heart attack. L L L It wasn’t in any of my bags or under the chair or anywhere in the car. I didn’t wanna tell my dad coz, well, you know why. I was frantic. I tried calling the cinema’s I went to but freaking busy.

When I got back, phone calls were made again and I have to call on a favor from a friend which was granted quickly. Im so thankful. In the end I get to call my phone and somebody answered. Gaaad I’m such in luck. And she was on her way back to KB as well. Thank goodness. I’m so relieved. I still have luck in my sleeve. Whew.

The whole time my heart was pounding like crazy. But I guess “All’s well that ends well” .

Dear new gf

Me passed!

The clock was ticking and I was waiting. The whole day I was useless. I was freaking out and practically was having a semi-coma state. Just an observation. I do not function well when its like that, who does anyway. I was trying to keep my mind off things talking to some of my friends. Shikhar was happy enough to do the job with his never ending ways to bring down someone's self-esteem or bullying and as he said while I'm "vulnerable"some more. lols. Few hours before 12 am I was tossing and turning on the bed. I was watching a movie but the next second I'm reading a book then to the computer. I was hopeless. This happens every semester as Jonathan said. He was there for the last 2 freak out during pre-result season. But this time I was really worried. My chemistry especially. I was expecting to fail or hopeful enough for a supplementary exam but when my ID number was not on the supp list I was hopeful but at the same time terrified. It could only mean I passed or I have to repeat the unit. :|

My friends tried to console and comfort me that I shouldn't worry too much, that I'm sure to have good results but none actually worked. Then few minutes before midnight I was still talking to friends when Syafiq said results was out. I was having a mini heart attack while I was logging on to OASIS and it seemed that the world went on slow motion phase. Sheesh. But as I saw the my results.

RELIEF. I passed all of my units.

My results were all good except for my Chemistry. But I'm thankful that I passed. :) I was soooo happy. At least I could leave that sem behind. But I gotta work harder next sem so at least there'd be more assurance. Im so thankful. I'm happy and happy for my other classmates. I'm also praying for the others that's having supp. Lotsa lucks!

Are you this or that?

I'm so gonna make a poem outta this, but for now, here's a thought. :')

"I've been there for you every time she takes a piece of your heart, every time she breaks it apart, every pain, sorrow, and tears she caused. To see you go back to her again just like tat makes me wonder if what i'm feeling right now proves that you are a real friend or much more than that to me"

-gM17♥

Food Guilt

Was watching GG (Gilmore Girls) then tummy was complaining for some food. So walking walking into the kitchen to get something. *digging digging* into the fridge, into the pantry, into the drawers. I found some corn, thought I could cook it with butter like what they do in Miri, and then I found the rocky road ice cream on the freezer. But know what? I ended up with a healthy yummy yogurt. Sigh.

I'd feel so guilty if I picked either of the two left options. :( I feel so fat. Oh yes say it, "You're such a girl"... But I can't help it. I am gaining weight. Going to the country club a few days a week doesn't really help. And my love for food ain't a sweet thing for this issue either.

Ugh. Why issit so hard to lose weight while it's so freakiin easy to gain. Just sit around and do nothing. Sigh. I miss my body before I went here in Brunei. Arrgghhh. If Brunei wasn't so damn boring. Oh yes, it is connected. Just think hard. Anyhow, tata for now!

♥ just me

♥

"Ocean"

So dad got this free tickets to watch at the Empire and he gave it to me and my sis. So sis and I went this afternoon only the two of us! Long winding road, I, sis, and music. LOUD music. It was awesome.

Well I think calling it a movie is not appropriate. Ocean is more like a documentary. It was a real eye opener. You could say it was a typical documentary. With the 'up and lower' it strategy. It showed the wonders of the vast ocean. Its amazing inhabitants, their culture, behavior. It's wondrous. How majestic and unique each creature is. The connections, relationships, between each of them. And not only between them, but with us too. The amazing symbiosis between whales and many other humongous sea creatures and a bluestreak cleaner wrasses or an anemone and a clown fish. But not only between creatures but between the same species too, like the graceful synchronization of sardines, intense same pulse of jelly fishes, or maybe the beautiful dance of dolphins.

After showing the wonderful mysteries of ocean, it shows humans destroying it. It was depressing. When i was seeing those whales, turtles, sharks, and stingrays and getting trapped in the net then the camera closes up on their eyes. Then it portrays a battlefield-like environment with all the blood and weapons between humans and those creatures. The cruelty of us humans. One more scene I could not forget was when they threw away a shark they caught back into the ocean after cutting all its fins. The shark sank into the bottom bleeding without anything to support and direct it to as its fin and tail was gone. It was just there, lying at the corals it landed to, struggling to move and bleeding its eyes like it was teary. That was just heartbreaking and depressing. :(

The ocean is vast and majestic. It holds many mysteries that we try to unfold. It tries to replenish and survives. But alas we take too much from it. Much more and faster than it can heal itself. We destroy it slowly and endanger its inhabitants not knowing we too endanger ourselves in the near future. There's no replacement sometimes with this things. Sometimes all we have is one shot. With these doings the only chance these creatures can survive is within the confinements of an aquarium or in a mere petri dish containing its DNA. How much more will we destroy till realization comes?

As I said the documentary was a real eye opener. Disney had done a good job. And I think it is appropriate for them to show it to my dad's company's employers. [It was only showed for them in the whole Brunei i think] They have a huge deep sea drilling on the blueprint so I think this was served as a warning and a caution. Hope the company's geologist and environmentalist knows their job well.

well this is just peachy

"well i have been

really busy

and... I gotta say

I'm In love once again...

She is just amazing

and...

if she does well on her exams

Ill get to be with her for a whole year

she will move to the US

and we can finally be together

this

is

the last stride

i just have to wait till november

for my happily ever after"

~

Holidays!

Whew! Never thought this day would come but here it is now. After extensive studying, sleepless nights, and skipped meals, it’s here. HOLIDAYS!

It has been exactly a week now since my holidays started. First days have been good, well at least I got the rest that I wanted. But it’s starting to get boring. I’ve been playing with Carlos and the guys at the club almost every afternoon. It has been fun, tiring too. Guess its just right as I’ve been eating so mucho!

Seems like I’m not going back to Philippines, in a time crunch. Need to be here just in case there’s a supplementary exam. Oh dear the results. Sigh. I’m so scared. So anyway i’m stuck here in Brunei. How sad is that.

So I’m stuck here, meaning i’d be reading a lot of books, surfing the net, blogging a lot and all sorta things just to avoid my dying of boredom. Wish me luck!

Holidays!

Whew! Never thought this day would come but here it is now. After extensive studying, sleepless nights, and skipped meals, it’s here. HOLIDAYS!

It has been exactly a week now since my holidays started. First days have been good, well at least I got the rest that I wanted. But it’s starting to get boring. I’ve been playing with Carlos and the guys at the club almost every afternoon. It has been fun, tiring too. Guess its just right as I’ve been eating so mucho!

Seems like I’m not going back to Philippines, in a time crunch. Need to be here just in case there’s a supplementary exam. Oh dear the results. Sigh. I’m so scared. So anyway i’m stuck here in Brunei. How sad is that.

So I’m stuck here, meaning i’d be reading a lot of books, surfing the net, blogging a lot and all sorta things just to avoid my dying of boredom. Wish me luck!

Its in the past

Remember I mentioned from my previous post i'll post some old poems, well here's the first one! This one is actually a compilation of verses I wrote at different time so it may seem a lil bit unorganized. Blank moments when I was taken back to my past ;) Here you go...

Another night has passed

A moment when you crossed my mind

It all comes crashing back

And it makes me lose my track

I can hear my mind saying

I hate you so much

I heard my heart whispering

I miss your touch

I was in way too deep

I fell way too far

Now that you’re gone

I cry as i strum my guitar

As I walk away and leave

After all has been said and done

My mind was clouded and a blur

My heart breaking had begun

I was blinded

and never saw it coming

I should’ve known

and shoul’ve started running

Its funny...

Its payback time.

This phrase might be something you'd expect from an enemy right? Well what if its from a friend? Yeah. Sucks right. I know you should be grateful that they helped you but it kinda... changes a perception when they actually slam it in your face and take it up on you that you need to return the favor. Don't get me wrong, i know it should be a two way, but it does kinda affect your perception as i said when it is forced and said. Oh well. Are they really friends? Can we call 'em that?

Tats all I wanna rant about I guess. Till next time! :)

Bruises and Scratches VS Butterflies in stomach!

Who cares about bruises? the scratches? the swelling? the pain? All I can feel are the things fluttering in my stomach.. BUTTERFLIES. And even though we lost, I was happy tonight. With the friends, the rain and some other persons, also I got my revenge in a way .... The rain was sooo romantic,.. Oh fine, yes, I think im.. in love? if not.. im happy? I dunnnoooo. I just can't stop smiling. I feel like im in cloud nine and because of him i can't not be happy. Lets just hope this one this one sticks. But I just know that I feel good and happy right now. =) I'm falling... :)

Aaaahh I gotta go and sleep. I have an appointment with him on my dreams.

Lovelots!

xoxo

glaizaMarie!

Nostalgic

I was reading some old messages, conversations, and writings. I feel very nostalgic. I wanna laugh and cry at the same time, and no im not crazy. Its just been so crazy if you look at where you've been. :) Bad things, good things, funny, devastating, all those. The poems I wrote, hey i wasnt that half bad if I do say so myself. So maybe tommorow i'll start reposting some of 'em here in my new blog. Not bad eh?

I just finished my report. Well OUR report. Im so relieved and happy. It has driving me nuts for a whole week now. At least thats one down. So anyways I gtg sleep now. watch out for the re-publishing of my poems!

"Screw being emo, I’ll get what I want"

-I wrote this about 3 days ago? or something like that. Just didn't have the time to post it. Nor the connection. nyways, here it goes.

I was feeling so stuffy in my room so I went outside to take a walk at the side of the lake. IT was sunset then and it was refreshing. The air, the warmth, the light. Then I sat at the table, our spot, one where we talked about our condensed stories and one where you said “never mind everything, I just want to spend time with you”.

Then I started thinking and being nostalgic, how it was, what used to be, I can’t believe it all happened and how it could just end. I was feeling helpless and was being emo for awhile.

I got this feeling which is not what I call nice but not also bad, I felt serene.

I want those days back, I want so many things, I know this sound so selfish and spoiled. But it’s not like that, it’s more deep seeded than that and I can’t put it into words. Then I kinda’ thought of something, I’m tired of just think how it used to be, how everything ended, and how I want things.

It’s time for me to stop thinking of just how I want things. I need to get them. I didn’t say that I didn’t make an effort before, because I did, really did. But now, I think it’s time to work on it. I may not succeed but at least I give it my best shot right? “Screw being emo, I’ll get what I want”

Happy Birthday to me! ♥♥♥

It's, so far, one of the BEST BIRTHDAY EVER!!! It lasted all weekend long. I love my friends, I love you guys and gals everyone. It makes me feel so loved!

2 hours before the clock strikes 12, I thought I was spending my birthday alone with the chardonnay bottle because I haven't heard from mona or anyone yet. I was feeling so left out. Then 5 minutes after 12, M texted me to grab the wine bottle and head there. They were suppose to tunr off the lights and when I walk through the door and sing happy birthday. But I kinda ruined it for them. It was really nice, the cake, the food, the wine and the JD. I started the icing war but they all turned to me and in the end I was a the icing-coated-birthday-girl. :)) It was a really nice gathering and there was a poker-dare-game after. But there were only 4 people played and it was interesting... hum hum. :P

2nd part of my birthday was at vittoria! Black and White party. It was AWESOME! Me and the girls look hot hot. We danced and drink the night through! People were there. Greeting me and hugging! I feel so loved again. Shots everytime I pass. LOL. Other things happened!!!! haha. Seriously it was awesome! I wasnt drunk, but tipsy enough. :))

Then Sunday morning, me and gang went out for seafood, window shopping, arcade game, starbucks, and camwhoring. It was just so fun. It was an extension of my birthday.

This birthday has been so fun and perfect. I love it. I love my friends and I love everyone. Its just so awesome. I wanna thank them all. I'm so speechless on how to thank them. For this day, the weekend it was PERFECT, AWESOME, BEST.. I'm so happy. So so overwhemingly happy. :))

Lovelots. xoxo!
gLaizaMarie♥♥♥

Getting Old

I'm only counting hours before I gain another year on my age. 19, The big 19. A year before you turn into your 20's. Sigh. Is it normal to mourn over your age? :)) Oh well.

Anyways, I'm a year older soon enough. 5 hours more to be exact. Time for reflection. Some "deep" questions. I don't mean that we should only do this when our birthday comes up. But its important to do this so on your birthday. :) Maybe questions like, "What lessons have I learned?", "Have I gone grown wiser?", "What else can I improved?", Sorta like those.

Past year of my life, I've made so many mistakes. I've hurt so many people. But I've been hurt a lot too. I try to absorb as many lessons-learned-from-mistakes. I've tried to "grow up" without being a stick in the mud. I try to broaden my knowledge. My dreams got bigger. I've failed so many times, I failed so many people. I've fallen down, I've stood up. So many drama's I've been into, escaped from, many I've caused and some I solved. This are just some of the "happenings" in the past year.

I wanna be a better person. But I can't help but make mistakes. I'm gonna learn from my mistakes. I won't let anyone get in my way. Do what I can. I'm gonna keep going and face obstacles head on. No? Chyea right, BRING IT!

Happy Birthday to me ^_^

Lovelots~
gLaizaMarie 17

Fries in the Middle of the Night

Its 1 am in the morning and here I am eating fries. haha. And I wonder why i'm fat. But hey to those whose judging, haven't you heard of a midnight snack? :P I'm so bored this past few days. Been eating my ass off. Mostly I'm leaning towards fries, rocky road, and ham sandwiches. heehee. Yummy.

So anyways I just felt like blogging since I couldn't sleep. Sooo I'm just gonna rant about whats been happening lately?..

The marks for my Geology proposals and practicals was released yesterday. I failed my practicals. I'm so disappointed. But I guess I can't say I'm surprised but I can't help but be sad. I need to up my game and study harder next time. I don't wanna fail this unit. :( I hope my other project and assignment won't meet the same fate. Sigh....

There's so much happening in Miri! My friends are all up to some things here and there. ;) All those crazy shenanigans. But I miss them all. So many invites I turned down, many things I have missed. :P Haha. For just two weeks eh? Gonna be back on Sunday! ;)

What else eh? Well seems like everyone of my friends has a love life of their own, daymn I'm slowly becoming a cynic.... heehee. I have none at the moment. Imaginary yes. lol. Though every time I tell that to the people who ask if I have a boyfriend, they won't believe it. They think I'm a liar. YIKES. I don't understand why. aisshh. Anyways,my friends have some problems too (of course), I hate seeing them hurt. :'( If only I could take or share the pain so to lighten the burden, or to make them a lil better I would. Sigh.

That's it for now. This did the trick, I feel sleepy now. :) Wish me luck on my studies and hope its gonna be awesome this coming dayS!

Lovelots,

glaii

xoxo

Niah Cave Trip

"...My lips like sugar" this is how my day started. My phone ringing at 6 am to wake me up for the family's NIAH CAVE trip! =) The whole family was excited as this was trying to be planned for so long now but things and people keep coming up to delay this. We went out the house at 7-ish am. Everyone was at high spirit and excited. Except for my mom. heehee. So we were on the road then, stopped at Miri's market first to change money and stopped at a restaurant along the way to have some brunch ;) We were on the road after that singing "....Estare contigo cuando triste estar, I'll be there befor the teardrop falls" haha. Old school! We didnt know the exact road otw to Niah, but we do know the vague road. We were going on circles when we reached the Niah town, turned out we weren't suppose to go reach the town. So we asked directions. Oh btw, what is up with man and asking directions eh? sheesh.

So we reach there around 1130-ish. We were hyped and ready. Mom was pretty scared riding the boat. lols. But it was just a short ride. So we started the track just talking and laughing. It was really nice. The jungle and its loud voice a.k.a insect buzzing, birds humming, wild animals, you know all that shebang. :P We were all talking and laughing. Its always like this on a family outing. Mom with her usual over-protective attitude which just provoke my lil brother to do mischief. lols. naughty naughty. The trees, butterfly, plants, just the scenery all was just pleasing. We didnt really notice the time passing by. :)

The caves were wonderful. But I don't like the smell of the guanos. I can barely stand it. But despite that, the structures, formations, the scenery were awe-inspiring. Me and my brother were like climbing on the structures and taking pictures. =) When we entered the 2nd cave where the archeological site is, we left my mom to the "house" there before we continued to the dark and very smelly path inside the cave. So I, Dad, Sis, and bro went further inside the caves. It was dark.... real dark. And we keep climbing up and down. Now that was tiring. So we walked and climbed till we reached the painting cave. Which by then we were long-winded. Haha. Especially my bro and sis. I was tired, but I was still hyped. I called them slowpokes :P

So we went back for mom and went back. There's some people who we met. Some chicks from Sibu and some guys from too. We even took pictures with the Sibu chicks. ;) Anyways. Amazingly I was still hyped though I was really tired at the end of the trail. We were so thrilled that we survived. haha. exaggeration. Anyways we tidied ourselves and we were so hungry and tired. haha. We passed by Parkson to eat at Secret Recipe. Daymn the Chicken chop tasted so nice. And that chocolate banana cake was oh-so-niiiceeee and just downright sinful. haha. Arrived back around 930-ish with body-aching but with satisfied... errhh lets just say I was really satisfied. Here are some pics from the trip!

>>>>this was so cool!under the opening on top of the cave

>>>the Sibu chicks! ;)

>>>>end of the trail!

>>>survivors ;)

Pressing the Refresh button! ♥

ZOMG... I can't believe its been a month already. I mean since I got to Curtin. Whew. What can I say? Same old same old??? In a way yes. But not so so. Also the saying that goes, "The players change but the game remains the same" applies here. heehee. Oh my.. there's a lot to update about. Seriously. heehee. Ok i'm gonna try to write everything. Just because. And i need to rant about it anyway. Its a healthy way of getting it out of my system. heehee.

Ok lets see what's on the list... 1st one up is about,

SCHOOL

Let me summarize it by what my dear honey Marwan said to me the other night "Hunz college has been raping you hard!!!" LOL. And I gotta agree with my honey. I has been driving me hardcore. This semester was really different from the last one. Wayyy different. Its only been a month and I've already had one meltdown. Its like almost everyday we have a deadline to meet. Everyday there's something important to do. If not a lab sheet to pass, a practical, if not a tutorial, a paper to write, if not a research, an online quiz. Resulting in several skipped meals and sleepless nights resulting in a very haggard me. I got seriously ill just before the holidays starts. Fever, sore throat, headache, back ache and let me tell you that was horrible. =( I still went to class with that sickness. Sigh. Even now that I'm in my holidays I'm still constantly thinking about schoolwork! Waaaah. But also somehow... I like being busy. Weird eh? heehee.

FRIENDS and PEOPLE

Well what can I say? I still have some of the old crowd, some I lost, and some new ones came. I love the old ones, I treasure them. =) But I hate losing people. I've met lots of people too and made connections with few of the other old ones I know of which is nice. =) But there's these few people... I don't know whether I still have them or I just lost them. Its just that with these people you don't know where you stand with them. Whether they're mad at you, friends with you, or just plain ignoring you. There was this one incident where I was close to being a bitch but I just thought they're so not worth it. Sigh. Even now some of my friends can't stand them. I don't want any bad blood really. But sometimes they're way out of line. Seriously. They should tone down a bit. But I'm trying to be friends with everyone, it sucks when you have to be awkward and stuff. heehee. Well anyways besides that I'm glad to have new people coming. We were even thinking of founding a sorority, won't that be fun? ;) Oh I'm glad to have my babe back. But its not like before. I guess he'd have to tone it down coz of the gf. Oh he lied about that to me btw which was... disappointing? Oh well I still love him, he's back and thats all that matters. Then there's this people I knew before but dont really have that close thing with... and now thats changing. I'm really happy for that. Bottomline is it sucks to lose friends so I try to keep them as much as possible which is hard. And I love the old ones that i still have and thats been here for me through thick and thin. ;)

LOVE-LIFE DEPARTMENT ♥♥♥

"ALL THE SINGLE LADIES, ALL THE SINGLE LADIES" hahaha. Yes yes I'm single... and ready to mingle? apparently so. Well what can I say? I just am. ;)

Its been roller coaster ride. And for the past track i don't wanna dwell so much on this so i'll just say I'm happy that your happy for now and thats all that matters. :P

And since I'm single and human I have crushes, lots of 'em. LOL, you know just crushes anyways. But they don't seem to notice that I exist (could I be more taylor swift-ish?) Some don't really know me and im too... SHY? Yea yea dont be surprises I can be shy too. There's this guy... he's smart, cute, tall, awesome player (sports not the player like playa') and he's so kind and sweet. Also his innocence is just too... cute? irresistable? haha. Wish I could be more closer to him. He seems so nice and cute. Thenn there's this other guy, and man he lookss HOT. He's got this snobbish but definitely hotness look. Daymnn. Then he have this hobby that just suits his image and makes him even look hotter like 1000 times!!! :))))

Then there's the few guys who pursuits me. But they seem to want more than what I can give to them right now. I already told them that I'm not ready yet, and they're good FRIENDS, yet they're oh-so-persistent. I think they're getting wrong signals. sheesh.

Bottomline? I'm enjoying as much as possible being single. I think I'm not ready for a full commitment for now. I'm just too hurt I guess from the last one. So cautious and yeah maybe you'd call me paranoid. heehee. But it would be awesome if one of my crushes actually works out... AS A FRIEND. :P anywaysss. oh love love love. ♥

So im ending this update session for now... this one's long aint it? well its a month worth of happening so there you go. :P Gonna update this bloggie tommorow too since I'd probably be bored coz I'm on holidays right now. :) Anyways... Life is life and a lil words of wisdom before I end this. "No life is a waste. The only time we waste is the time we spend thinking that we're alone" ....

Lovelots! ♥

glaizaMarie

xoxo